Scientists reveal why you should NEVER flirt with others to make your partner jealous

Flirting with others to make your partner jealous is a really bad idea, experts warn.

Whether it’s to boost your self-esteem or to give your partner a kick, it can be tempting to look at someone else.

But instead of strengthening your relationship, it may backfire and damage your connection, scientists say.

A team from Reichman University in Tel Aviv conducted three different studies involving more than 500 people to investigate how people react when others express interest in their current partner.

All participants were in committed relationships and were exposed to situations in which their partner received unsolicited flirtatious advances or had a neutral interaction with another person.

Flirting with others to make your partner jealous is a really bad idea, experts warn (stock image)

They were asked to rate their sexual desire for their partner, their interest in trying to maintain the relationship, and their interest in deterring rivals who were hitting on their partner.

The analysis found that when other people showed interest in their partner, they then showed less interest in investing in the relationship, felt less desire for their partner, but became more concerned with thwarting potential rivals .

Researchers said that when you’re single, outside interest in a potential partner can be a valuable clue as to their desirability.

However, once in a committed relationship, this attention can be perceived as threatening and trigger defensive reactions.

Writing in The Journal of Sex Research, they said: “Across three experiments, we showed that individuals perceived their partners as less sexually desirable when their partners received unsolicited attention from someone else. »

The analysis found that when other people showed interest in their partner, they then showed less interest in investing in the relationship, felt less desire for their partner, but became more concerned with thwarting potential rivals (stock image).

They stated that when faced with a “threat”, individuals may seek to distance themselves from their partner to avoid the potential blow that rejection could bring to their self-esteem, “rather than risk becoming more attached to a partner whose commitment could be compromised by rival suitors.”

“Overall, our findings highlight circumstances in which external attention directed toward partners may erode relational well-being instead of promoting relationship promotion,” they said.

“When the likelihood of partners being attracted to someone else is perceived as high, such as when receiving attention from others, people may become emotionally detached from their partner and consequently reduce their relationship investment. »

“While the desire to deter potential rivals still exists, it may be rooted more in retaliation than in genuine efforts to maintain the relationship.

“Alternatively, anger triggered by others’ displays of interest may be simultaneously directed toward partners and potential rivals, albeit in different ways—resulting in partners’ emotional disengagement and conflictual responses toward rivals.

In conclusion, they wrote: “On a final practical note, our results suggest that, contrary to commonly held beliefs, attempting to pique the interest of a current partner by seeking attention from others can backfire.”